lastvoyages IC Inbox

[neverjoinyou]

Leave a message. I will hear you.

Comments

text/late December 2019 i guess?

[tetractys]

[The tight little miserable coil that's been Bill's emotions for a month now now eases up very abruptly, sometime in the middle of the day. At least a third of what's been weighing on him gets lifted, all at once.

It's not all gone. Breaking up with Ford had uncorked a lot of what he'd simply been refusing to deal with in the past. But this takes it from unbearable to tolerable, lightens it enough that the rest is now going to be much easier to handle.

Is Bill going to remember to mention it? No, probably not.]

[neverjoinyou]

[He's not spying on Bill. It's not his style, and it's not something he thinks would help win the other being's trust. But that doesn't mean he doesn't have a little thread connecting them, something Luke develops with those close to him on instinct. A vague knowing of where they are and whether they're ok, though of course the Barge's filters interfere with it.

Bill suddenly feels way more okay than he has in weeks, so much so that he actually becomes conscious of it rather than feeling it as a low-level hum. And the first thought he has as to what it might mean makes him smile to himself.

And then he gives the triangle a little time to do... whatever it is he's doing, before Luke texts him.]

Something you want to tell me?

[tetractys]

[bill immediately tries to remember if he's done any crimes lately]

THAT KNIFE IS STRICTLY FOR SELF-DEFENSE

[neverjoinyou]

WHAT?

[tetractys]

OH &$#%

[neverjoinyou]

You know you can cuss, Bill. The problem here is whatever knife you're talking about, not the words you use to express being caught.

[tetractys]

IT WAS A GIFT, I GOT IT LAST CHRISTMAS! I HAVEN'T EVEN USED IT ON ANYONE!

[neverjoinyou]

[Oh good, his Bill headache is back. Whatever else that's going on must be bad, if Bill is trying to distract him with this.]

So why did you mention it when I asked what was going on?

[tetractys]

I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID BESIDES THAT!

[seriously what did he do, shit, he can't remember]

[neverjoinyou]

Why did you assume you'd done something wrong?

Because you obviously did something with a knife I didn't know about.

[tetractys]

YOU ASKED IF I HAD SOMETHING I WANTED TO TELL YOU! USUALLY THAT MEANS I'VE BEEN DOING EVIL STUFF!

I HAVEN'T, I JUST APOLOGIZED TO FORD EVEN!

[neverjoinyou]

If I've given you the impression I always thing you're doing something wrong, I thought we were past that.

I contacted you because I felt that you were happy, and I assumed something nice had happened, and I assumed it had something to do with Ford and wanted to grin stupidly at you about it.

But now I have to worry about a knife.

[tetractys]

LOOK, I HANDED IT OFF TO SOMEONE WHEN WE WERE GOING INTO A BOARD GAME TO FIGHT MONSTERS. THAT'S THE ONLY TIME IT'S GOTTEN USED! IF YOU WANT IT YOU CAN HAVE IT.

[neverjoinyou]

I don't WANT your knife, Bill. I kinda want you not to be handing them out, and the fact you thought of it when I asked what was going on is troubling.

[tetractys]

AWWW, I HATE IT WHEN YOU'RE MAD AT ME.

I GAVE IT TO A WARDEN, I JUST DIDN'T WANT THE GUY GETTING EATEN THAT'S ALL.

[neverjoinyou]

I'm not mad at you! I was actually pretty pleased until you started acting guilty about knives.

[There is a pause.]

Okay I'm going to switch to video and then we're going to start over, okay?

[VIDEO]

Hey Bill. How's it going?

video

[tetractys]

[Bill has wound himself the fuck up and now looks wary.]

HELLO.

[His hand goes around behind his eye, like he's rubbing the back of his head.]

I FORGET HOW THINGS WERE GOING WHEN WE STARTED THIS! FINE, I GUESS. A LITTLE BETTER!

Re: video

[neverjoinyou]

[Luke smiles with reassurance! Really!]

Hey! I heard you talked to Ford. How'd that go?

video

[tetractys]

[Bill perks up; his eye pulls into a tall, happy oval.]

IT WENT WELL! FORD'S GREAT. WE MISSED EACH OTHER. ... I REALLY WASN'T BEING FAIR TO HIM, PULLING ALL THIS, BUT HE TOOK IT WELL. HE ALWAYS TAKES IT WELL, FORD IS GREAT.

video

[neverjoinyou]

[Luke's starting to get that little vicariously giddy glow back in his gut.]

Wait. You weren't being fair breaking up with him?

video

[tetractys]

I WASN'T BEING FAIR TELLING HIM HE DIDN'T MEAN ANYTHING TO ME.

[That shit was probably hurtful :/]

video

[neverjoinyou]

No. That's true. Especially since it was a lie--even if you weren't sure, yourself.

Where did you leave things?

video

[tetractys]

I THINK WE'RE BACK WHERE WE WERE! BUT DIFFERENT. A, A COUPLE DIFFERENT PEOPLE TOLD ME I'M IN LOVE WITH HIM, AND I DON'T KNOW IF THAT'S TRUE, BUT IT'S MESSING WITH MY HEAD, LUKE.

HIS CABIN STILL CREEPS ME OUT.

video

[neverjoinyou]

[Luke grins. Of course he's in love with him.]

I'm happy for you. I'm... yes. I'm glad you spoke to him.

video

[tetractys]

[hes not ready to commit to that statement!!]

WELL, THAT'S GOOD, IT... PROBABLY MEANS I DIDN'T MAKE A BAD MISTAKE.

I THINK IT JUST GOT TOO MUCH TRYING TO FIGURE OUT- [sigh.] BOTH AT THE SAME TIME. TRYING NOT TO BE BAD FOR FORD, OR RUIN HIS FRIENDSHIPS, AND ALSO TRYING NOT TO CARE ABOUT ANYTHING. OR TRYING TO TREAT HIM LIKE AN EQUAL WHEN I DIDN'T THINK OF HIM AS ONE?