neverjoinyou | lastvoyages IC Inbox

Oh. Yes, it's affecting me, but not thoughts. Just feelings.

[But that's the last text, until he shows up at her door, a little disheveled and looking... both tired, and young. And if she can feel it, scared for the first time since she's met him.]

[While this flood is active, Rey has kept herself in her room almost exclusively. There are times every few days that she leaves to get more food from the cafeteria, but it's the sort of quick trip that she does as efficiently as possible to minimize the time she spends outside her own room where people can pick up on what she feels, what she thinks, because she hates the feeling.

It's like a less painful version of what Kylo Ren did to her so yes, she's gone out of her way to avoid it.

It also means that when she opens the door, her hair is pulled into one bun instead of the usual three, her arm wrappings are missing, and she isn't wearing the linen wraps that usually cross her chest. Mostly she's been sleeping and eating, waiting all this out, and she just looks tired and unhappy. She lets him in though, and closes the door behind him.]

You said there was something you wanted to see me for?

Yes.

[But Luke pauses, finally registering, as he couldn't before (without the link, always quietly monitoring her presence), that she's unhappy and dealing with her own sorrows. The empathy kicks in, over his own problems, and he realizes belatedly that she doesn't want to see anyone.]

I'm sorry. I didn't know who to talk to. I... shouldn't have bothered you, but I think you should know... It's gone. [He swallows. What's gone is the one thing that brought them together.] I can't feel the Force.

[She's shaking her head, waving off his apologies as she leads the way inside so they can sit down at the holochess table. She doesn't want to see anyone, that's true, but she also knows that's an impossible thing to want when she's made connections here she does want to keep. She can't cut people out entirely just because she's uncomfortable, she knows that, but some habits die very hard.

When he continues though, she absolutely gets why he feels so uncomfortable, reaches out to put a hand on his arm.]

I'm sorry. These don't last, though, it will come back once the flood has ended.

I know.

[And he feels kind of stupid, for bringing this to her when he knows that, but... he just feels so lost.]

You just get so used to it, you know? And as hard as it is, this thing, not being able to control what you feel... it's weird, not knowing where you are, that you're okay. It's just... Like something's been cut out. [He flexes his right hands.] And I know what that feels like.

[It's touching that he would worry about her, not patronizing like she might have expected it from anyone else. It's valid here, when they're on a path towards something called the Land of the Dead and there's no way to know what's in store for her.

And she might not have the same connection to the Force that he has, but she can at least put herself in his shoes. She's learned recently that she does have the capacity to care of people, and a large part of that is because of Luke himself, so it's easier than it would have been a month ago to lead him to sit and take a seat beside him.]

I don't intend to leave here more than I have to, so I'll be safe. I can... I'll call you, if that will help.

[It helps a little, having her close. But it still makes him sad, her need to isolate herself. As alike as they are, it's something they don't share.]

Yeah. Just... check in? Let me know. And Rey... I know I'm overreacting, and I know I'll be okay, so if there's anything, anything you need, you'll tell me?

Edited 2016-04-27 05:31 (UTC)

[As much as it goes against her nature to ask for help or rely on anyone, Rey nods all the same. She can make this compromise if it's something that's going to keep Luke from worrying about her instead of focusing on looking after himself.]

I will. [And she thinks for a moment that's all she has to say, but something is sitting wrong and she wants to address it.] But I don't think you're overreacting. People can't control what they're afraid of, so they shouldn't be expected to handle situations like this perfectly. It's nothing that you ever thought you would face, so don't berate yourself for reacting to it.

[Luke smiles sheepishly at her.]

You're right. I just... I don't know. I think too much of what Han thinks of me, sometimes. And this one... he hasn't been through everything the one I know has. We're bound to talk at cross-purposes, sometimes, I guess. He just has this ability to turn me back into that stupid kid I was when we met.

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