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[neverjoinyou]

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[neverjoinyou]

Luke turns from surveying the blasted ground to face Bill squarely. "What's actually bothering you?" he asks. "That I got blamed--which I would have been, regardless of my knowing--or the idea that if you hadn't told me, maybe you'd have gotten away with it?"

[tetractys]

"I GOT AWAY WITH ENOUGH OF IT!"

He accomplished what he wanted to accomplish. He crosses his little arms.

"PEOPLE ARE BLAMING YOU MORE THAN THEY'RE BLAMING ME. BECAUSE THEY 'EXPECTED BETTER,' SUPPOSEDLY, BUT ACTUALLY IT'S BECAUSE THEY THINK YOU'RE RESPONSIBLE FOR MY ACTIONS!"

Bill jabs his finger forward.

"I DID IT! ME! I PLANNED THIS, I BUILT THE CANNON, I FOUND THE COORDINATES, I PROGRAMMED IT! I UNDERSTOOD WHAT I WAS DOING, I'M - I'M CAPABLE OF KNOWING WHAT THE CONSEQUENCES OF MY ACTIONS WOULD BE! I THOUGHT IT THROUGH, I CHOSE IT, I DID IT, NOT YOU!"

He's built up a lot of steam by the end, frustrated shrieking. He's seen too many people acting like Bill is Luke's dog that went off his leash and bit someone, or that he's Luke's kid who broke something in a store - something that's not quite equal to being an independent person that should be expected to know right from wrong.

[neverjoinyou]

Oh. In a way, Luke is relieved--it's an actual emotion, related to what had happened, and it's about time for something like this to come out. So Luke sits on the ground, legs crossed, full attention on Bill.

"They're blaming me," he says quietly, "for trusting you. In their eyes, erroneously. Because, yeah. You did this. You made this choice. And you are responsible for what happened. They're mad at me not because they don't think you understand, but because they don't think you care."

[tetractys]

"WAIT, WHY ARE WE SITTING, DON'T SIT..."

That implies we're gonna be here talking about this for awhile instead of never talking about this!

"I DON'T CARE. IF I'D TAKEN THE OPTION OF COOPERATING AWAY THEY WOULDN'T BE MAD AT YOU. AND I COULD HAVE!"

[neverjoinyou]

"Of course they'd be mad at me!" Luke says forcefully. "What do you think they'd've done to a warden who never noticed any of that? No matter how good you are, how smart, it's my job. A warden who can't do his job is not a warden for long. So where would you be?"

[tetractys]

"TONS OF WARDENS ARE BAD AT THEIR JOBS, EVERYONE MAKES MISTAKES. YOU DON'T GET DEMOTED UNLESS YOU KILL SOMEBODY."

He's not convinced here.

"I'D BE FINE, AND YOU WOULDN'T HAVE GOTTEN KILLED!"

Obviously the solution is to take more choices away from people so they can't hurt themselves.

[neverjoinyou]

"You're not listening," Luke says, still patient though Bill's starting to eat away at his store of that. "First of all, I don't mind having died. Not for a good cause. I'm okay. I'm fine." He sighs. "And the only reason people think you're worth keeping on this ship is the fact you did say something. You spoke to me, I listened. We have a connection. This would be a lot worse for all of us if you hadn't.

"So why don't you tell me what your real problem is?"

[tetractys]

Bill throws out his arms, exasperated.

"YEAH, OKAY! I MIND THAT YOU DIED! WHY DID YOU DO THAT?"

[neverjoinyou]

"It's what happens when you get hit with a ton of energy!" he almost snaps.

[tetractys]

"I KNOW THAT! WHY DID YOU JUMP IN? I DIDN'T ASK YOU TO!"

[neverjoinyou]

"Because it's what I do!" Luke does snap this time, staring at Bill like the answer is so goddamn obvious he's amazed he's even having the conversation. "Because you were in danger and it's my job to protect you!"

[tetractys]

"NO, NO!"

Bill starts pacing, hands tucked behind his back and flying in tight little ovals.

"I HAD IT HANDLED. THE SITUATION WAS UNDER CONTROL!"

[neverjoinyou]

"No," Luke says firmly, "it wasn't. You don't control me. You don't control my actions or my desires. Or my... my instincts. And my instinct is to protect those I care about. Is it a good instinct? I don't know--it's definitely not a survivalist one. But it's who I am. I didn't set out to die, that day, Bill. And it hurt. And I might not have come back. But I can't say I wouldn't do it again, because I did what felt right at the time."

[tetractys]

"YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE EVEN HAD TO!"

[neverjoinyou]

"Why? Because you should've gotten away with it? You didn't. You upset people, you made a choice, and they made a choice to come after you. That's just how it is, Bill, and how it happened. Even you can't foresee every outcome. Sometimes things go better than we plan, sometimes worse. But there's always a variable you can't predict or control."

[tetractys]

"BECAUSE I SHOULD HAVE SEEN IT COMING!"

Knowing what he knows about Wings, and Gold, and the spell, and the loophole, and the information he gave out as bait -

"I'M THE ONE THAT TOLD HIM YOU COULD KILL PEOPLE INSIDE THE SPELL! I THOUGHT HE'D BURN HIS CHANCE ON ME, NOT YOU!"

[neverjoinyou]

Luke stares at him.

"He did," he says after a long moment, as if trying to piece together what part of this Bill's missing.

[tetractys]

"UUUGH, BUT YOU GOT IN THE WAY. I SHOULD'VE KNOWN. I SHOULD'VE KNOWN!"

He goes back to pacing, in the opposite direction this time.

"LOOK, I LIED TO YOU, ALRIGHT? THE GUY THAT MADE ME IS DEAD. BUT IT WAS SUPPOSED TO LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT."

Early on in the port, Bill stole the body of the man who created him. Pretty routine. Luke had been there for that.

Just before the final fight, Bill had become a triangle again. He'd dodged questions about why, and where his creator's body had gone, and claimed it was still intact.

As apparent proof, he appeared to be wearing the same human body during the fight where Luke died, and stood next to him as a human. That's as much as Luke stayed alive to see.

"I WAS WEARING AN ILLUSION. ERSKINE WAS SUPPOSED TO KILL ME, WHICH WOULD DESTROY MY PHYSICAL FORM! EVERYBODY WOULD SEE HIM KILLING THE MEAT PUPPET I WAS INHABITING - IT'D BE HIS FAULT THE GUY WAS DEAD, AND NOBODY WOULD GO LOOKING FOR A CORPSE!"

[neverjoinyou]

This doesn't surprise Luke nearly as much as maybe it should. Is he disappointed? Yes, but he's not shocked. But he does realize that any progress with Bill has an as-yet undetermined number of steps back for every one forward.

"I realize this doesn't make sense to you," he says slowly, thinking it through for himself. "But I'm going to tell you, anyway. I'm more upset that you lied to me than that you killed him. And if Erskine had killed the man, I wouldn't have been angry--because he'd have done it thinking he was taking down someone he thought was dangerous." Luke rubs his eyes with his hand. "But you knew I'd be upset that you killed that man, and so you knew enough to know it was wrong. Or at least, that I would think it was. Why do you care?" He watches Bill closely, though his expression is actually more curious than angry. "What made you hide it?"

[tetractys]

He remembers the conversation with Fives, reluctantly.

"THE GUY DIDN'T DESERVE ANYTHING LIKE THAT. I JUST WANTED TO DO IT. AND I DIDN'T WANNA EXPLAIN MYSELF TO A BUNCH OF PEOPLE WHO DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANYTHING THAT MEANS THEY COULD BE WRONG."

[neverjoinyou]

Luke shakes his head.

"You're not making sense," he points out. "You're admitting he didn't deserve it, and that the people who disagree with you are wrong. You can't have that both ways. We don't agree with you because he didn't deserve it. You're acting like there's no context for any of this. Just you getting what you want, versus not. That's not the same thing as morality.

[tetractys]

"IT'S NOT MORALITY! IT'S - "

Bill turns, breaks eye contact.

"HE REALLY HAD MY WORLD IN HIS FIST, WINGS. WE WERE JUST PUPPETS, AND NOBODY WANTS TO HEAR THAT. THEY THINK I'M CRAZY 'CAUSE I CAN'T PROVE I'M RIGHT. BUT I KNOW. I'VE ALWAYS KNOWN. AND IF I KEPT HIM ALIVE, I'D NEVER BE ABLE TO STOP WONDERING WHICH THINGS I DID WERE REALLY COMING FROM ME AND WHICH WERE COMING FROM SOMEBODY USING ME FOR ENTERTAINMENT. I'D NEVER BE ABLE TO KNOW IF I WAS REAL OR JUST THOUGHT I WAS."

[neverjoinyou]

Luke takes a deep breath.

"Don't you think I wonder that every day since I got here?" he asks quietly. "I've spent the past four years of my life trying to life up to a future that people a lot older and a lot smarter than me believed was my destiny. I broke that future, and then I came here--and learned it had all been someone else's holofilm. So what am I supposed to think? Am I real? Am I a tool of the Force? Is my life being written by a filmmaker or a cosmic power? And if I never do find out, how do I move forward?"

He does not expect Bill to answer any of these questions.

"It is about morality. Because morality is about choosing right or wrong. And yeah, it's more complicated for you, because you learned something that affected your perception of whether you can choose. But here's the thing--either you chose to kill him, which was your moral choice, or you simply did what was written. So either way, has anything changed?"

[tetractys]

"IT CHANGES TO ME."

Bill turns back around.

"LOOK, I DON'T KNOW ABOUT HOW ALL THIS INTERACTS WITH RIGHT AND WRONG, BUT I KNOW PEOPLE DON'T BELIEVE ME OR DON'T CARE WHEN I TRY TO EXPLAIN THIS. AND I BET THEY WOULDN'T BELIEVE YOU OR CARE EITHER. THAT WAS MY WHOLE REASON I NEEDED HIM DEAD. SO IT WAS JUST EASIER TO NOT EXPLAIN IT AT ALL. LET PEOPLE THINK WHATEVER THEY WANT, I DON'T CARE."

The big sulk he's doing now indicates that he does, in fact, care.

[neverjoinyou]

"That's why we're here," Luke insists, growing slightly irritated again. "To figure out how 'all this' interacts with right and wrong! You went straight from assuming people don't care about you to needing some poor man dead. Don't you see what a huge leap that is? Don't you see that something being difficult isn't a good moral reason? Gods. I risked everything to avoid killing the one person everyone in my life told me had to die for us to win the war, because I thought there had to be another way. Don't you think I would have fought for another way for you, too?"